Autism ADHD and so much more.

Autism is not a tragedy, but living in a society that doesn’t understand it can be – Dr Beardon.

The bowl and the spoon or reliability points.

The original idea for this is the marvellous Dr Luke Beardon, Professor of Autism Studies.

The possibilities of each new day are endless and unknown, so if just one thing is fixed or certain then at least that’s something. I am not obsessed with this thing or fixated on routines. I am actually overwhelmed, and confused by the myriad of experiences that will throw themselves at me each day, knowing that my logical brain will stress and strain to navigate all of this. If one thing is known, it is because everything else is unknown. To me, it seems that neurotypical brains, or predominant neurotype (PNT), which is the term that Dr Beardon has created to move away from an idea of anything being typical. So I think that the PNTs cope with far less because their intuition allows them to already know what is coming. 

Now this, I really like. It really helped me to understand being me, and I think that explaining it here might help to pass on my aha moment. The lovely Dr Beardon writes with such warmth, kindness and understanding towards autistic people and I would say that his books are must read. He talks about the wonderful honesty and loyalty of the people he has met, but he also discusses the challenges that are faced. One of the stereotypes of autism is the repetitive or fixated behaviours that are viewed as inflexible. Whilst it is true that these exist, and are indeed often not up for negotiation, what is not discussed is why. Dr Beardon gives the following example about a bowl and a spoon. He calls these reliability points. It is only his theory, and I know there are loads of other ways and reasons which could be discussed, but his explanation felt like it fitted me, and could help explain why I am like I am.  

He explains that for a neurotypical individual, about 95% of their day is known.  It is something that they feel comfortable with and know what to expect. If something unexpected should happen, they have their intuition and their rule book which will help them glide on through. So, the 5% of uncertainly will hardly even make their boat wobble. They may not even notice. He suggests that for a person with autism the opposite is true and this I can believe. Because most of their day – 95% – will be filled with uncertainty, they need to use the remaining 5% for things that they can rely on and depend on to be certain and true. 

The boat for the autist is always rocking back and forth and sudden waves hit and wash over it, so if the routine of a 9am coffee is the only thing they can be sure of, then it needs to happen. If they always eat out of a certain bowl with a certain spoon, then they need this to provide something known before venturing off again into the great unknown. What I am saying, is that it may not necessarily be that they are obsessed with the spoon – as stereotype would suggest – but more likely that a calm routine of something familiar provides a brief respite before the storm. Some people may indeed love just the spoon, and that’s great too, but I think that from outside looking in, they think that we are not flexible. The truth might be, that in fact, for some of us, we are incredibly flexible. Being tossed and turned across an ocean of unknown currents, and dangerous shores makes us expect the unexpected. It is nice, therefore, to sometimes have a trusted oar to cling to. 

Do you have a story to share or questions to ask? Would you just like an informal chat about autism or need to organise training at work? Please comment here, or find me at feelingtheworlddifferently.co.uk