All material is taken from my book Feeling The World Differently. Copyright owned by me.
I am not an expert on neurotypicals but in over fifty years I have seen lots and read lots. More recently I have read and researched the neurodivergent brain. So, I know that they are different.
(Some people don’t like the term neurotypical because of the typical bit. Dr Luke Beardon recommends the use of Predominant Neuro Type (PNT). I’m more interested in the message and the meaning that the terminology and think continually being offended by words might overshadow the message. But I will always respect the way that someone chooses to identify of course.)
A common myth,misconception, and misunderstanding seems to be that we are not flexible and need fixed routines. While this may feel like it is true, no-one seems to dig deeper and explain that for many of us, every minute is filled with the unknowns of the next, and we need to find something known for a moment of regulation. I will post my piece on ‘reliability points’ next. Dr Beardon’s term.
So this one is called Camping at Base Camp Everest.
An average neurotypical NT, or PNT, gets up on a planet they understand and feel secure in most of their knowledge about it. They know what to expect from their colleagues and what their colleagues expect from them. A meeting with the boss might be worrying but with their special skills menu they will know what to say and more importantly – what not to.
And so, for them it is a camping trip on a mildly windy day. They have the instructions for the tent and are confident about the assembly. Some bits might be missing but they can borrow a tent peg or find a rock nearby.
There might be some undulating ground to avoid and if the wind gusts with menace they may have to work quicker and harder. They may need another jumper. But they know that they have stayed happily in that tent before and have survived to rise in the morning with the sun. They know that if a storm arrives, they can hastily retreat to the car and go home. They know where the car is parked, and they know the way home. They may be damp and disappointed, but they will put the kettle on and plan the next camping trip.
I am human just the same as you and I have arrived with my trusty tent ready to embark on my camping adventure.
But I am at Everest Base Camp. All around me are people with different languages and customs. I need to try and communicate with them so I can find out where to pitch my tent and how to buy some food and if anyone knows the weather conditions for the next day.
A storm of snow or wind or both could make erecting the tent impossible. If this happens then I have to find shelter in this desolate and inhospitable place. I have no idea how I will attempt the ascent to the summit tomorrow. I have no idea what I will awake to find or even if I will be able to sleep through any of the night.
Just like the neurotypical trip, we are both camping, but the harsh unknown, unpredictable nature of my surroundings and the lack of anything known or secure, means that my energy levels will drop rapidly, it will be difficult to relax and when I spill my only flask of hot coffee it will be enough to reduce me to a heap of sobs.
If this is me in the office, you will think that I am overreacting to something as simple as spilled coffee.
You might tell me to stop being pathetic and that I am embarrassing myself.
The coffee is irrelevant. I know that it makes it easier for people to look away and walk away if they believe the myths and misconceptions. Stay away from her, don’t invite her, she always overreacts. She gets upset at the smallest things.
But if you’d watched a documentary of me ascending to Everest Base Camp alone, watched me pitch my flimsy tent in wind and driving rain, watched me struggle to find food, and watched me trying to decipher the map for tomorrow’s climb – then you might just understand why spilling my hot coffee mattered.
Autism ADHD and so much more. 
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